Book Review: The Connected Child

The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family
by Karyn B. Purvis

This was an excellent parenting book. The main focus is on parenting children from difficult backgrounds, but I think this is a great book for any parent. I loved all the specific action steps, it really makes the research accessible to put into everyday life. I will be using this book again as a reference. 

This is perfect to help set expectations for adoptive parents. It is realistic and also puts things in a realistic light. Well written and full of insights. 

Fingerprints

Slowly but surely we are making our way to China.

Yesterday we got out fingerprint appointments in the mail! Yippy! Our local USCIS office allows you to come in before your appointment (if you have the appointment letter) to get printed. So this morning I kissed my oldest son goodbye as he headed off to kindergarten and I headed downtown.

I arrived at the USCIS office and got a prime parking place. Me and the two younger boys headed to the 4th floor and life was good. But, getting through security was kind of a hassle; me, two boys, a stroller, a car seat/infant carrier, my purse, a diaper bag and of course my belt and iPhone that needed to be put in a separate container to x-ray.

When I handed my letter and Driver's license to the security guard he looked at me and said, "This appointment isn't until April 12. Is there a reason you can't make that time?" I wanted to flick him on the side of the head and say something snarky. . . but I didn't. I said, looking at all my gear and kids I had just hauled to the 4th floor . . . "I was just hoping to get it done earlier, if it isn't too busy." Then I looked through the glass wall to the fingerprint area. . . crickets were chirping. Not a soul in sight, only two workers sitting behind desks.

"Okay, let me check."

So a few minutes later I was checking in at the main desk and in less the 3 minutes I was being fingerprinted.  Nice.

So, where does this put our timeline you ask?

DH plans to get his fingerprints taken tomorrow and that will hopefully complete the USCIS portion.

Our agency said if we are getting fingerprints now we should get approval "mid-April".  If we get approval April 15, I will state certify all documents on April 16, then Fed-Ex them to the Chinese Consulate.  I think the consulate is taking about 2 weeks to authenticate. It is possible the first week in May we could have a completed dossier to go to China. Then we wait 1-4 weeks for an LID.

This almost puts us in "Wildly Optimistic" territory.

China Timeline

Now that our homestudy is done and sent to USCIS, I thought I would share a more detailed timeline for our adoption.

Once we get our I800 approval (around May 1) we can get all the dossier state certified (this can be done by an in-person visit to the state capitol, same day).

Then we send the dossier to the Chinese Consulate to be authenticated. This takes about 2 weeks (around May 21).

Then our dossier goes to the agency to be sent to China. We will get our LID in 1-4 weeks, (around June 21.)

So, we should have a Log in date around the end of June. Then we can be matched anytime after that. Because we are requesting a girl under three our wait times will be longer.  We waited about 2 months to be matched with J., so I think our wait times might be closer to 4 months, maybe longer. But it is impossible to tell, our daughter might be matched with us sooner.

This is from the agency:

Once you are matched you can expect your dossier to take about 5-12 weeks to go through the processes until you receive your LSC (letter seeking confirmation.). That is your actual referral from China for the little girl you will be matched with. After LSC and the paperwork piece to accept this referral -way less paperwork then dossier.. don't worry:), you can expect to travel about 2-4 months after that.

So. . .about 8 months from referral to travel.

I am getting really excited! I really hope to have a referral by the end of year and travel next summer :) Sooner would be better, but it is important to have realistic expectations.

Here is a spread sheet with the numbers:

Homestudy. . .done

We got an email yesterday that our homestudy has gone through the final review process with our agency. We have a green light! No more revisions need to be made.

Now we wait to get the final hard copy in the mail. I am thinking it will be mailed today or Monday. So we should certainly get it next week. I have the USCIS paperwork all filled out and ready to mail with our near $900 check.

We are told that USCIS is taking about 45 days. As soon as it comes back our dossier should be done. We only have a handful of things left to prepare and they are all pretty easy. We already have all the time consuming things done (basically the medical and all the blood work). Now we just have to fill out some forms and have them notarized.

If it is taking 45 days, our Dossier should be complete around the first of May. Then off to get authenticated and then finally, off to China. Once our dossier is in China and we get a Log In Date (LID) then we can be matched with our daughter. I really feel like we'll get a match by the end of the year.

This is really good news. It only took about a month to finish our homestudy (after all the time we put in last summer.) I am happy with our timeline so far. This is a great big thing to check off the list